He’s so wise.
He’s so wise.
E-mail I just received from Mia:
“hi brittany i’m having bacon!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
What I wanted to respond with:
“God I’d really love some bacon right now. I’m so fucking hungover.* I could eat about 20 pieces.”
What I actually responded with:
“Yum!! Mama made bacon this morning, huh?”
*No, I didnt follow my honey-on-toast advice.
I read last week that it’s good to have a piece of melba toast (I don’t know what that is really… so I guess take a piece of bread and toast it), and put a little honey on it. Eat one before you go out, and one when you go home (don’t start whining about eating before bed… you just consumed 800 calories of booze and sodium).
The honey counteracts the alcohol and will help with your hangover. No, that doesn’t mean you won’t still get drunk so don’t worry— your liquid courage will still be there when you try to talk to the douchey model type in the bedazzled v-neck. The requisite water bottle chug before bed is obviously still in place, too.
I left an issue of Marie Claire in my bathroom yesterday, which I had read during my bubble bath (hey, don’t laugh… try one after your muscles have gotten a beatdown). The bathroom also happens to be where Dakota stays when I can’t take her to work.
I came home to find one page of the magazine completely destroyed. It turned out to be a sample version of the perfume I wear every day. I take this to mean one of three things:
I hope it was #1. I’ll even take #2.
I give myself a C+.
The C for being VERY visibly frustrated and a bit curt (including rolling my window up as the parking lot security guard was talking to me). The + is for not hurting people who take longer because they don’t speak/understand English.
On the upside, the editor here brought me another organic PB&J sandwich to cheer me up. It worked.
I just got an e-mail from FSU saying they’re deleting my school e-mail account on St. Patrick’s Day, since I haven’t been an active student there for some time.
Well, at least it’ll be acceptable to drink my sorrows away that day.
The Verve, Oasis, Coldplay, and Radiohead make for the best workday playlist.
Dear Brittany, I don’t like it one bit how you have gotten all “Hollywood” on me and now I don’t get my usual facebook messages or chats.
Your Bitter black friend,
But I’m still amused that you need to differentiate yourself by race, in case your first and last name in the “From” section weren’t enough.
And sometimes it falls into your lap when you walk out of your kickboxing class— covered in sweat, face beet red.